In one of the best episodes in recent memory one electric segment follows the next!
We get Truth versus Miz, Lana apparently did something bad and Samoa Joe is about to do something awful!
Find out what exactly happened by reading on!
It‘s Miz TV! Only it‘s not. It‘s Truth TV.
What the hell, are WWE Televangelists now?
No, nothing that drastic. It‘s simply R-Truth‘s version of Miz TV.
He‘s accompanied by a trailer park trash looking Carmella.
What on earth is that on her hair!
I know it‘s her hair, but what happened to it?! Why is it trailer park trash red?
What are they doing to the princess of Staten Island!
And why on earth did they suddenly decide to push R-Truth?
Oh, and I think Mella is a face now…
She‘s so cheery and happy when she introduces their first guest Daniel Bryan.
Gosh, I‘m so confused!
Truth tries to be professional and puts on glasses.
He also got all of his questions written on cue cards.
He talks about Daniel wanting to foil the plans of Miz and the other Carmella.
Here‘s what I don‘t get.
They still want to have him portray a really stupid man while also legitimizing him.
Here‘s my question: can a joke character ever be legit?
He then asks how cathartic it would be to finally beat Miz and get closer to the WWE Championship.
Daniel likes that question and it‘s way better than Miz TV.
However, before he can answer Mella and Truth dance for seven seconds.
Oooooookay?
Daniel says that really makes the show better.
Oooooookay?
Daniel then explains the word catharsis because Truth doesn‘t know it.
He wants to get the Championship and he‘s got unfinished business with Miz!
Therefore it would be cathartic to beat Miz.
Aaaaaaaaand then Miz comes out on stage.
He complains to Truth about Truth TV and the crowd cheers it immensely.
Truth explains that he took his talk show because he beat him.
He‘s an idiot, says Miz.
I‘m an idiot with a talk show responds Truth.
It‘s weird that I actually like Truth.
It‘s oddly working.
Carmella still should do so much more though.
Miz then tells us that people love Daniel because he‘s Daniel and Miz does whatever it takes to win instead of Bryan and therefore he‘ll win.
He‘ll do anything to win the championship but Daniel is too proud.
The only way to beat him is to betray his own moral code and cheat.
Truth screams at him because he ruined the show and then he bands him from Truth TV for life.
Miz wants the show back and Truth says they‘ll fight for it…
And then there‘s another dance break including confusion from me.
Miz then runs over to Paige to complain.
She says that he has to fight for it against Truth if he wants it back.
The Miz versus R-Truth for the right to host a talk show:
I can‘t figure out if the stakes are ridiculous or amazing.
They‘re fighting for a talk show segment.
That‘s either brilliant or stupid.
Daniel joins the commentary team for this match.
Sadly the match isn‘t as good as the first one they had a few weeks ago.
And also sadly enough it‘s gonna be Miz TV again from now on.
Miz wins!
Bummer!
I would‘ve loved to see more of Truth TV!
It was so ridiculous!
The next segment was taped at a photo shoot for Charlotte.
I give you three guesses what happened.
If you were thinking that my waifu Becky came in and attacked Charlotte you were completely right!
She tells her that no one wants to see her face, people wanna see the champion!
Agreed!
And then she tells the photographer to take a photo of her stepping on Charlotte while holding up the title.
Well, damn! That was awesome!
They also inform us that Charlotte was sent home because of the injuries she suffered during that attack.
She‘s totally gonna attack Becky later on, isn‘t she?
Future me here.
Real quick, no, no she didn‘t.
Big E vs. Sheamus:
And now for another match!
We‘re moving on fast and furious!
I‘m excited!
New Day tell us that they respect the Bar and that Cesaro beat Kofi last week.
They take them seriously.
They then play the say something nice challenge and everyone says something not actually all that nice.
Cesaro looks like a Swiss Jason Statham which is good because they like his movies.
Even the newer stuff?
I think his newer movies are kind of shit.
He‘s turning into Steven Seagal.
And Sheamus must have the same hair color and haircut in his private region.
Family friendly entertainment my foot!
Sheamus says they never learn and all they wanna do is joke while the Bar always wants to fight and their jokes will end when they take the titles from them in Australia.
This match was a bit short, wasn‘t it?
Good, but too short.
Sheamus wins.
This has got me worried!
Usually if they present the heels as unstoppable before a title match they have the faces overcome all of the odds in the end.
I‘m quite sure that‘s what will happen here.
I don‘t want that!
I want the bar to win.
We‘ve already seen enough of New Day as the champs and it‘s time for change!
Paige asks AJ not to destroy anything later, the stuff is so expensive she says.
He tells her not to worry. If he has to destroy anything during his contract signing he‘ll make sure it‘s Samoa Joe.
Short and snappy! No long winded speeches about being proud of your company and crap.
That‘s how I want my AJ!
Rusev demands answers from Aiden!
Before him and Lana come out Rusev assures her that he just wants to know why his former friend did it.
He calls him out and he answers immediately.
He‘s dressed in a suit and he has his own shirt now.
Happy Aiden Day.
Brilliant!
When they met no one cared about Rusev, says English. He lacked direction but he saw potential and made him the most beloved Superstar in WWE.
And then he presents us with a recap of their rise to power.
He continues.
People chanted for them at WrestleMania the whole night!
They were destined to be legends.
What happened?
WWE Creative fucked it up.
Yeah it‘s not what Aiden says but it‘s the truth either way.
Aiden however says that Lana happened.
He also has a video showcasing why it‘s her fault.
Lana then tells him that before him she made Rusev crush everything and he‘s just riding on Rusev‘s coattails .
Yeah, Aiden answers, no one can question her loyalty for Rusev. She‘s honest with him.
But if she‘s honest will she tell him about that one night in Milhwakee?
What the fuck!
And then he walks off!
Wow! what on earth was that?
I apologize for my swearing, but this was a shocking revelation!
We don‘t know yet what Aiden meant!
Did Aiden and Lana hook up?
Did she try to kiss Aiden and he refused because he‘s Rusev‘s friend?
What on earth! I can‘t wait to find out!
Asuka throws punches that are too powerful for her training partner Naomi. Asuka just smiles and says: Strong Style.
This was funny.
No idea why it had to interrupt the Rusev story, but hey, if it‘s funny it‘s funny.
Yeah, the story continues!
Lana is talking to Rusev backstage.
She has no idea what Aiden was talking about!
Mh. Responds Rusev. He‘s still wondering what he meant by Milwhakee.
Couldn‘t they‘ve picked a less complicated city name?
Like Dallas or Stars Hollow or Castle Rock.
Why did it have to be Miwhakekekek.
Becky comes along and says she‘s interested as well.
Lana tells her to mind her own business.
Lynch says that because she tries to perform in the women‘s division (nice burn!) it makes Lana her business.
And then I think she challenges Rusev‘s wife to a match.
Something about carrying her out and curtains.
It‘s bad ass but I still can‘t really decipher what she meant.
The Lass-Kicker walks off with a cheeky „Milwhakeeh, eh?“
Rusev asks Lana when the last time they were in that city with the awful name I‘m not gonna try to pronounce again was.
Lana angrily storms off.
This is brilliant!
Asuka and Naomi vs. Sonya DeVille and Mandy Rose:
Also brilliant is that right when the Iconics want to talk Naomi‘s music hits! I was never more grateful for a theme song!
You see, the Iconics are on commentary.
Crap, more opportunity for them to talk!
They show us how Sonya Deville and Mandy Rose interrupted the friendshippening of Asuka and Naomi earlier in a video before the match.
Asuka picks up the win.
This was throwaway but at least the Iconics didn‘t talk all that much.
Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Tye Dillinger:
Apparently Tye complained about Shinsuke on Twitter.
So, now that he was replaced with Carmella he gets to play jobber again.
Fabulous!
I had a thought during this match.
Maybe Shinsuke is Orton‘s next victim.
I was half right!
It‘s Tye Dillinger!
He comes out to attack the perfect ten.
Now you‘re just toying with the poor guy‘s emotions!
You won‘t get him over by feeding him to Orton.
I love and hate that it‘s not Shinsuke.
By keeping him in the mix they add tension.
You‘re waiting for the moment when Shin will be Randy‘s target.
However, that also means that in the interim there‘s nothing Shin is really doing.
Shin drives that point home by attacking Tye for good measure before leaving.
Good segment.
Kinda pointless to call it a match though.
Lana is indeed fighting Becky Lynch and Rusev wishes his wife good luck.
Lana is pissed. You don‘t really mean that.
Of course he does, he reassures her.
Why does he believe Aiden, he‘s obviously a liar.
Well, he‘s obviously a liar and he doesn‘t believe him.
Wait, what?
Now he doesn‘t wanna know what he meant?
I still wanna know though god dammit!
Randy is asked if Tye is his next victim.
No he isn‘t, the perfect ten crap just pissed him off.
So is Shinsuke your next victim?
You confuse me, Viper!
Who is his next victim gonna be?
Lana vs. Becky Lynch:
Okay match.
Lana taps out.
Apparently Aiden has video evidence of what he meant and after the match he tells interview girl five thousand that next week he‘ll show us all.
Yes please!
What on earth will it be!
The last segment for the night is the contract signing for the No DQ, No Count Out match between AJ and Joe for the title in Melbourne.
Hm, the only thing that has been lacking so far were the matches.
It was still a good show, sure, but this last segment couldn‘t possibly justify for the lack of wrestling action, could it?
Paige tells us that she‘s done her best but this‘ll probably end in carnage anyway.
Joe doesn‘t show up!
Styles says he‘s probably gonna attack him from behind.
It‘s fine that he‘s not here, but he‘ll be in Melbourne.
Aaaaand then Joe appears on the Titantron.
He tells AJ that the best part about their job is to travel around the world.
Joe is at Styles‘ house!
Styles is getting angry and helpless.
Joe goes up to the front door.
Do you feel guilty that you didn‘t heed the warnings?
He even got a doll for Annie, he says.
He asks AJ if he‘s feeling paralyzed now. That same feeling is what he‘ll feel when he takes the title away from him.
And he will, because AJ stole it from him!
Joe then rings the bell and says Daddy‘s home as the show fades to black.
What on earth did I just witness!
Sure, it was a logical next step to show him actually go to Wendy and Annie like a serial killer, but don‘t tell me you believed for a second they‘d actually go through with it?
I sure as hell didn‘t!
I thought they wouldn‘t have the guts!
This was way better than a normal contract signing!
They are surely mixing them up lately!
And ye,s it did totally justify them focusing more on story than on matches!
Heidewitzka, this episode was amazing!
Just one good segment after another!
Really great episode!
Way better than Raw!
I can‘t wait to find out what Lana did next week!
It‘s gonna be crazy!
See, you don‘t have to announce matches we‘ll forget in a week.
Instead introduce cliffhangers like this and we‘ll all tune in!
Everything here flowed perfectly!
From the beginning all the way to the end with Joe visiting Wendy.
This was brilliant entertainment!
I love it!
What was your favorite part?
Lana or Joe?
Something else maybe?
Tell me down below!
feel free to share my account of the tale of horror that was the contract signing.
Now, I decided to do 205 tomorrow, NXT on Friday and Mixed Match on Saturday.
Hope you like that choice.
I think this works the best.
See you tomorrow for 205.
Have a great day!